The society is full of curious people. Some are curious about what their neighbours are doing. Some are curious about what their boss or employees are doing. Some are curious about how others live their lives. There is a not so nice word we use for curious people as such – Nosy. I have come across quite a few nosy people in my life and a very famous question they throw my way is, "when are you getting married?"
If you have been reading my blog over the years you probably already know my history and my views on marriage. However I would like to give my answer to this frequently asked question right now. First of all, if you know a person is single regardless of if it is a girl or a boy you should never ask them when they are getting married. The reason is quite obvious. If they are single how would they know when they are likely to get married? Meeting the right person takes time. Then you take even more time getting to know them and to figure out if he/she is the right one. If you haven’t met someone even remotely close to ‘the one’ how can you answer that question?
I believe if a person asks you this question knowing you are single then that person takes pleasure in hearing the negativity in your answer. He/she takes pleasure in others’ failure and if you say "I’m still single," the follow up question would be, "oh, you still haven’t found someone? How old are you?" Nosiness to the extreme! Do not be depressed by these questions. Then again, assume you know a couple who has been dating for some time. I still believe you should not ask them the marriage question unless you know they are engaged. Let me explain.
Sometimes even when a couple is dating there could be instances when they are not sure if their partner is ‘the one’. Maybe they have only been dating a short time. Or maybe they have been dating a long time but they still haven’t figured out if they are ready for the next step. Either way a question like "when are you getting married," can disrupt their relationship. It could cause them to have doubts especially if they have been dating sometime. There could also be an instance where one person wants to get married but the other is not ready. A question like this in a situation like that could lead them to breaking up. When two people truly understand each other they will announce their engagement themselves. This is the only instance when you are even remotely allowed to ask them about marriage as this is when they start wedding planning.
A special note to all you singles out there. People may ask you about marriage. They may think you are growing old and all sorts of things, but just remember that your life is yours. The only person who has the right to say anything about the way you live your life is your creator – God! No one else! If you enjoy single life as much as I do, then enjoy it. Do not let anyone tell you otherwise. If you want to get married someday it should be because you have met the right person, because you want to get married, not because others want you to. Marriage should never be for someone else except your own self!
Society is a dark wave waiting to feed on people’s failures. Do not fall for this darkness. Do not be depressed with the pressure you get from society for any reason but fight back for your freedom! Fight for as long as you like. The nosy people will eventually be defeated when they see you happy and enjoying life in the way you want and not the way society is trying to push you. They are nosy because you have everything they never had!
I have defeated all barriers the society has thrown my way so far. I know you can too!